Hello from Baehr and Curadh a podcast from the Land of Awes information services
I love you Curadh. I love you Baehr. This is episode 110 of the Baehr and Curadh podcast
we're going to talk about aging gracefully.
What are some of the things you could get away with in your 20s but no longer can?
Being sassy.
Think so? Were you ever really sassy though?
I don't think so.
I didn't know you then but I can't imagine you being sassy.
I can definitely see you being sassy.
Really? I really wasn't out of the closet in my 20s though.
I guess we'll have to shift the thinking as a decade down.
No, that's fine. I don't think I was sassy. I mean, I know maybe.
People love sassy gay characters on sitcoms but in real life they're there.
They're treasures.
And when you get older, it doesn't look sassy. It just looks bitchy.
Yeah, I mean, it looks like a bitchy old queen.
Remember when we were giving away stickers at the festival?
I said, "Do you want a sticker?" Everyone said yes except this one bitchy old queen.
No.
Then his partner, he would go out for the money and he's like, "No, I won't sell it."
But he didn't say it. He didn't ask the other, "Did he?"
That's what I'm called for.
I really don't think I was sassy. I don't think I'd give him all those a lot of people.
You know what I mean? I was afraid they would find out you were gay.
I just like having fun. I was more of the laid back guy that was trying to get everyone to laugh at the bar.
I know along with everybody. I mean, sassy people kind of annoyed me.
The whole femme.
I don't know if this is not necessarily a feminine attribute.
Well, just over the top attitude I should say. You really drove me nuts, really.
I could put a damper on hold. In every gay group there was one.
Oh yeah.
They think it's cute when they're younger, but your identity becomes tired.
And you're a bitchy old queen.
It doesn't age well. What's the next one?
Hitting on men in their 20s.
But when you're in your 20s, that's fine. Yeah.
When you're in your 80s, it doesn't look so good when you're hitting on guys in their 20s.
Yeah, but I mean, if you can, good for you.
Well, you can, whether you succeed or not, if you succeed, then you're really going to be doing some.
But yeah, I think some old queens, they go by the spaghetti method.
That's that. You hit this spaghetti against the wall and see what it takes.
It takes, okay. Yeah.
The white noodle will get so long.
That's probably all they have to the white noodle.
All right.
How about drinking alcohol and being functional the next day?
Definitely.
Something that I don't do.
Yeah. Well, we haven't drank.
Five in a decade, maybe.
About five or six years.
But now, I remember going out in turn of time, when I went out and being functional the next day worked as part of it.
You knew you were going out.
That's the difference between my generation and the generation now.
Now the generation today just calls in the work.
I remember going to work no matter what.
It's part of if you were going to have to pay, if you were going to have to play, you had to pay.
So that was one of the things that came new.
It's soft. Don't get me wrong.
It's days where I just want to be back home and call to the bed and you're saying hangover.
But yeah, I mean, I went to work.
Like so many people, you asked the boss, where are they today?
She says it's Monday, so they have a migraine.
Everyone knew that I was pretty much just hungover.
I didn't hide it.
But yeah, you were never a drinker really, so I don't think for you ever even doing that.
No.
There was a time up in Kansas City, this Daddy Baehr bartender just kept pushing drinks at me.
And I got so drunk.
And the next day I said, "Remind me how I feel right now the next time I want to drink."
Those last time you get that drunk?
I think so.
Did you have fun with the Daddy Baehr?
No.
And I would have been too drunk to anyway.
No.
Let's see, cigarettes.
I was a social smoker when I read it still.
I don't think I've had any lasting effects, but I was a social smoker.
I thought it was cool.
So I wanted to do.
And then it's disgusting, gross habit.
I think this has a little less to do about aging and just the change in society.
Yeah.
Working is not as acceptable as it was.
I would agree with that.
It's almost like the people who smoke now are like pariahs.
Yeah, and they're pushed to a corner in the bar.
You know what I mean?
It's generally outside patio or something like that.
And that's where you hang out because that's where your friends are.
Yeah.
Well, when I go to watch football and there's a TV outside, sometimes it's nice outside.
But it does drive me crazy sometimes when I'm stuck out there with a bunch of people who smoke.
Because even though it's outside, you're still surrounded by smoke.
And it's not as bad as it's to say it's indoors, but it's still bad.
You still come home smelling like smoke.
And that's a bar.
Those people who are over 21, they should know better.
Yeah.
There's been plenty of education campaigns.
Yeah, but it's an addiction that people, you know, it's more happened to me.
True.
I guess I don't will probably never understand addiction.
So it's just like the booze that they drink.
You know what I mean?
You know, it's just...
And hey, you know, you know, those years that you're not going off your life,
are they really any fun anyway?
Yeah, this come off the ass in the life, so.
But yeah, I mean, teach them.
I'm not here to judge them or pass the judgment.
I just choose not to be around.
It's that often, so.
Thinking you're at the center of the universe.
Definitely a 20-year-old thing.
And sometimes a 30-year-old thing.
And sometimes a 40-year-old thing.
But eventually you come out out of it.
Did you really ever think you were the center of the universe?
Or did you shit in his thing?
When did I stop?
And that's why I forgot this house.
Isn't big for both of us being...
Yeah, I...
And I think the... the... the implication there is...
You can kind of get away with it when you're going.
People will forgive you.
Yeah.
But my thing is, you get older, you get become...
You become more knowledgeable, and why is it?
So you... you actually become more close to the center of the universe.
But you just kind of lose that in belief in yourself.
Yeah, I guess, after experience, after a point, you learn that there's a whole lot more in the universe
that you don't know than what you do know.
Yeah.
That would have been a great time, 100%.
With age comes wisdom.
Yeah.
Okay.
Tight clothes that show off your assets.
Never really wore anything like that.
I don't think I did either.
Yeah.
I mean, the Baehrs were relaxed, fit, leave eyes.
Okay.
There were no tight sweaters or medium shirts that show off your muscles or anything in my group.
Okay.
And most of the younger guys who could have done that, they were really popular
and those are the first ones that died of AIDS.
They were pretty promiscuous.
Yeah.
The pretty ones.
You know, they slept around.
They slept around and got into shame.
Yeah.
Yeah, I never did that.
I just...
Do you have plenty of clothes though?
I have plenty of clothes, but I never wore clothes to show off my assets.
I never...
What assets do I have?
Come on now.
Let's hear what you're talking about.
I think you did like to dress pretty preppy.
Oh, yeah.
I enjoy dressing up.
Yeah.
I still do enjoy dressing up.
I just don't do it anymore.
But, yeah.
Yeah.
I used to dress up all the time.
And it was in like formal dress.
It was more casual.
I also got to remember I did work in retail clothing for a while.
So I kind of had to represent the clothing brand that I worked for and all that.
And at some point, you learn nobody...
When you're not young and hung anymore, saying, "Look at me.
Look at me."
Nobody's looking.
Yeah.
And now that on the head, every time I see a pretty young gay who's got attitude, I think...
You're going to get your come-up because those looks aren't going to last.
You need to develop some other manners.
Yeah.
Because you're right.
I mean, there's nothing more on becoming than someone who thinks that their shit doesn't think.
You know what I mean?
You really truly believe that.
And it is kind of sad when you do see them later on in life.
Because then all of a sudden, they're coming up to you kissing your butt, proud of seeing you.
You know what I mean.
And it's even more on becoming.
It's like, we'll go.
And it's like I shared in sacrifice and everything to get where I am.
You're not going to sponge off me.
Like you did when you were cute.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Because we got wisdom too.
You're right.
So where are we at?
Oh, this one's a good one.
Color, older men, trolls.
I definitely remember one guy who said, "I'm just going to commit suicide when I hit 30 because my life is over."
How pathetic is that?
How shallow I minded.
Wow.
Did he do it?
I don't know.
I can hang around with him.
Okay.
I don't know.
I don't know if he gets dated or something.
I'm kidding.
Wow.
That's really shallow.
It seems like at some point that either call you an old troll or they don't acknowledge that you exist at all.
Yeah.
I don't think it's as bad as it used to be.
Probably not.
People don't hang out at bars and that's where that kind of attitude was most prevalent.
Yeah.
They have the apps now.
Instead they just swipe left and you never know.
Yeah.
Well, they didn't have that on that.
We met on.
I don't know.
I'm joking.
So, yeah, I was never doing like that.
I never called older men trolls or, you know what I mean?
It's rude, first off.
And when it makes you better to pass, he gives you the authority to pass judgment.
And obviously those people thought they were better.
Yeah.
Well, like I said, you'll get your come up because nobody stays young forever.
It's your vampire.
Yeah, it's very true.
Hard labor, yard work, household chores, etc.
I really didn't do that.
I'm kidding.
I worked.
I did some serious hard labor jobs when I was younger.
I think that's the point here.
You can do those things when you're in your counties in 30s.
At some point, you just can't do it anymore.
I mean, I think we could.
I think it'd take a long time for it to take a long time to recover.
Just going out and pulling weed, be sore the whole next day.
Yeah.
But we'd still be able to do it.
I mean, we want to get worth it.
No, we want a month to.
You know what I mean?
But who does really have a higher symbol?
20 or 20 or 20?
That's an idea.
I mean, we both decided we can't mow the lawn.
We hire somebody to do that.
Yeah.
The last time I did mow the lawn, I think it just about killed me.
Yeah.
You were pretty wiped out.
In the heat.
Yeah.
Now we have so many.
It comes behind, doesn't it?
20 minutes and it's like, did I?
It's done.
So it's a pretty well spent 40 bucks.
Yeah.
Definitely worth it.
Yeah.
All right, being sexually aggressive while farting.
I was the worst at this.
You were sexually aggressive?
Uh-huh.
Were you really?
I would grab guys by the crotch, squeeze their boat, their, their, their move behinds.
Really?
Yeah.
And I was good looking.
I could get away with it.
If some old troll had done that.
I can't see you being that aggressive.
Hmm.
That's why it was so disarming.
People didn't think I would be that way.
Yeah.
I mean, you're so quiet.
And there's been a societal shift, too.
Yeah.
So there's been a societal shift where it's more frowned upon.
Well, good.
I think, yeah.
There's a whole lot of guys who did stuff like that with women who now are scared.
Scared shitless that some woman's gonna call him on it.
It's assault.
And even what you were doing is assault.
You know what I mean?
But since you were doing it to another guy, it was more acceptable.
And if somebody reacted negatively, I would stop immediately.
I wouldn't press myself on them.
Most people like the attention.
Hmm.
At least pretend to.
Yeah.
Hmm.
Yeah, that's, uh, you surprised me with that.
I'm surprised.
Yeah, I was never sexually aggressive like that.
I don't think.
I'm trying to think.
I mean, you know, maybe once or twice.
I think I'm maybe handful of times being drunk or something like that and doing it.
And then waking up the next morning and being completely embarrassed that I did do it.
I remember doing it.
Oh, I don't think I ever had any regrets.
Oh, yeah.
I see.
I regret it.
Just because I knew it was inappropriate and I should have done it.
So, um, yeah, I was embarrassed the next day by it.
Impressing peers.
Hmm.
That's a good one.
Now, I'm pressing by how that's what I'm trying to think.
Oh, I'll cut into ways.
Your fancy gold watch or fancy clothes.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm guilty of that.
The car you drive, where you drink and stuff like that.
Anything that possibly impressed your peers.
That's what it covers.
Yeah, I'm guilty of that.
The point is when you're young and young people will let you slide on that.
I think a whole lot of people live away beyond their means trying to impress their friends.
Yeah, yeah.
And I think even today, corporations thrive on that.
Especially with certain minorities.
You know, you need to, you need to drive a Lincoln to rest your friends.
You need to have gold rims on your, on your wheels.
You need to have a gold grill on your teeth.
I think a lot of people.
They live beyond their means trying to impress people.
Yeah, you're right.
And there's a lot of it.
And I was probably killed the other two back then.
And in your 20s and 30s, you can't really afford to.
No.
I mean, you know, a 50-year-old man who has a $100,000 of your job can afford to drive a BMW.
But some kid on student loans shouldn't be doing that.
No, but there is.
You see a lot of those kids do that too.
And in the end, what does he do?
Nothing.
You can't tell you that those impressions can get you a bunch of debt and poor credit.
All right, spicy foods.
Spicy foods.
Well, I've never really liked spicy foods.
Although I will say I will try anything.
Yeah.
You're not a spicy food person at all though.
Not just for regular meals.
And so I don't know what I've never really suffered from that.
Yeah.
And so I can't eat spicy foods any longer.
My stomach can't handle it anymore, so.
But it's kind of like drinking.
Yeah.
Oh, when you get to a certain age, you don't bounce back like you did.
No.
You're right.
It's funny.
I mean, like a lot of that stuff just just come along in the past 15 years, 10, 15 years.
But when I was younger, all that stuff never bothered me.
You know, I mean, it's it is aging.
And then your body changing.
You can't just do it as possible before.
So.
But yeah, I do miss eating spicy foods though.
I do.
But I don't.
My body's going, yay, thank God.
But yeah, I do miss eating.
And I think cigarettes have a bit to do that.
The people who I've known who really enjoyed spicy food also smoked.
I think they killed some of their taste buds.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, it does.
It kills your taste buds, your sense of smell.
I mean, it clouds a lot of your senses.
Like there's just some of my coworkers complain about that.
You ask them, can you smell them?
They're like, I can't smell anything.
I'm from smoking for so many years.
And smell is probably the biggest part of food.
Mm-hmm.
And when I quit smoking, like I said, I smoked more socially.
It was more social smoker.
Like I never lit up during the day or anything like that.
It was only when I was in the bar.
And then if I tried to smoke when I was like not drinking, I was gross.
And it just moved.
So my quit, it wasn't very hard.
It wasn't hard for me at all.
But it was, you know, the best thing that I ever did.
So just felt better, felt better, felt cleaner.
It smelled things, things tasted better.
So, yeah, I'm happy I did.
Stop it.
A cigarette has never ever touched my lips.
Yeah, but your lips have touched other people who smell cigarettes.
Definitely.
So, like kissing an ass tray.
Mm-hmm.
So, yeah, I've definitely thought that.
Mr. Handsy over here.
(laughs)
I'm teasing.
All right.
This next one's kind of out of that field.
Hard directions.
Something you have to give up in your older age.
Yes, you do.
Yeah.
Then I'll come.
A soft breeze could come by when I was 20.
Yes.
I could knock down a wall.
Yeah, you would get a hard on for no reason and be embarrassed by it.
Yeah.
Now, if I had a hard on, I'd be proud of it.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, just things just don't quite work the way they used to.
So, I won't remember when the porn industry made it come back shortly after Viagra went on the market.
Mm-hmm.
All of these porn stars who thought, you know, they need to retire.
Mm-hmm.
You could work again.
Yeah.
Put a new spin on the whole market.
Yeah.
There's a lot of people here who love those pills.
So.
I can't do that.
It gives me flu-like symptoms when I take.
Mm-hmm.
So, the sick feelings, they don't, they're not worth taking the pill.
Yeah.
So, I went to a urologist and he prescribed, I want to say it's like triox.
It's tri something that has three different things.
And it's a liquid in a vial and I'm injected into my penis.
And I guess because of being diabetic for so long, injecting things really doesn't scare me.
Mm-hmm.
And that stuff works really well.
Mm-hmm.
Far better than Viagra ever did.
Yeah.
So, I would highly recommend it for anybody who has trouble with Viagra.
Yeah.
Yeah, I would too.
Yeah.
Just, you know, anything experiencing what you've gone through with it.
Mm-hmm.
So, I want to try it sometime.
Not that you need it.
Yeah.
I mean, Viagra works fine for you.
Yeah.
So, I would like to try it sometime.
I would like to get you to the urologist, I guess.
Yeah.
And that stuff is expensive.
I believe it was $200.
For a while.
Insurance wouldn't cover it.
No.
Of course not.
We have an HSA.
Yeah.
Evading responsibility.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I think everybody does it at 20s.
And people will let you have a pass on it.
Mm-hmm.
Like, oh, isn't that cute.
Yeah.
So, it's basically wrong with the next one.
Good health.
Evading responsibility.
And good health.
I mean, yeah.
I don't get it.
No, it's just one of those things.
You take advantage of it when you're younger.
Mm-hmm.
I mean, they're completely different things.
You do take advantage of them when you're younger.
Mm-hmm.
I mean, when are you agree?
Yeah.
I guess so.
But, um, you know, evading responsibility
was also pretty much up there with, like, um...
I can't think of a term for procrastinating.
I go get that.
What's the connection?
Just people.
Instead of taking responsibility for something,
you just procrastinate and put it off.
Mm-hmm.
Eventually, some older person will do it for you.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I guess, like, if I was in your line of work,
I would probably see that in programming.
There is nobody else to do it for you.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
It's just, um...
I think it's just part of life.
I think it's just part of growing up.
Mm-hmm.
You know what I mean?
Most of us...
Really young children are...
are completely selfish.
Mm-hmm.
You know, no, I'm not going to give you my cookie.
Yeah.
Um...
Manor is something that we learn as we grow.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, definitely.
And so, um...
Well, we were just talking about being selfish.
That's the next one.
Mm-hmm.
But let's go back to good health.
Okay.
When you hit your 50s...
Everything goes.
Yeah.
Downhill.
There might be a check box on your life that says,
"Okay, everything's going to fall apart now."
Exactly.
Because it's what exactly what happens.
When you wake up in the morning, everything's sore.
Mm-hmm.
It's, uh...
The amount of prescription pills you have to take is like quadruple.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And so you basically come out with a...
Who's who and what, what of...
What could go wrong with you?
Well, it could go wrong, well, exactly.
And it'll come out of nowhere just making the face.
Mm-hmm.
[laughs]
So, I think it's when you, like, when you were growing up,
it was always the joke.
It was like...
Over the hill is 40, but now I think over the hill is 50.
Mm-hmm.
But, uh...
Yeah, it's...
I think it's real, I think.
I don't think it's just a joke.
I think it's real.
Would you agree with that?
So, in the time of your life, when you had good health,
you didn't...
What's the right word?
You didn't respect it.
You didn't...
You didn't take advantage of it.
Mm-hmm.
When you should have.
Exactly.
And then you pay the price that you get older.
Mm-hmm.
Or you should have took your career,
or you'll carry your body better when you were younger.
But, like, not smoking and drinking when you were younger.
So...
Nobody's gonna...
They can tell you that, but you're not gonna listen to me.
No.
You think you're in 20.
Yeah, they think they're invisible,
and they've got the world by the tail.
Oh, yeah.
That's what I mean.
That's all you've got.
You just say, "Your day will come."
Mm-hmm.
And then there's some people that they actually get away with it.
Some...
But the majority don't.
Other time, we'll always catch up.
So...
Okay, okay.
Tank tops.
Tank tops never wore them.
You know this.
I'm wearing a t-shirt right now in short.
But if we went somewhere,
you'd put a shirt on over that t-shirt,
and you'd put another pair of pants over those shorts.
It's called putting a pole over the t-shirt.
Tank tops.
That's your type of thing.
So...
I still wear them.
Yeah.
Mostly around the house, though,
not so much on public.
Yeah.
I was never a tank top wearer.
So I'm not...
Even my road.
I hated tank tops.
So, yeah.
It's just...
Too embarrassed by how somebody might see you.
I guess you could say that.
I just...
I just don't think they look nice.
I don't think...
I'm not on me anyway.
I think it's fine for other people,
but I just don't think they look right on me.
So, I guess you're right.
I'm too embarrassed.
You really, really, really need to see yourself the way I see you.
Yeah.
Well, I appreciate that.
I can say the same thing about you, though.
I don't think I have a bed, so maybe.
No.
I guess not.
No.
Mr. Hansy.
[laughs]
No.
I'm teasing Baehr.
No.
I do.
But you've known that for about me for the longest time.
You know, I've...
Yeah.
We couldn't be a more different people.
Yeah.
And that's just another case.
Contact sports.
No.
Yeah.
I mean, it's just like contact sports, like playing sports, like contact.
Yeah.
I used to play basketball.
No.
But I used to play football.
I don't play anything.
I used to play them all though.
You're right, though.
And as I got older, it comes back to being old and taking care of your health.
And when you turn 50, it's like the new 40.
And now you know you're not only going to fall down.
You're going to break something.
Oh, yeah.
And it's going to hurt.
It's going to hurt for a long time.
Yeah.
So, you just...
It's easier not to do it.
So, but I do miss playing some of the sports and all that stuff.
And then a lot of the other stuff like that.
I tell them it's at all.
But I love to go on swimming the golf course again.
But...
Well, you could do that.
I just feel that you, because I'm so afraid you're going to step in a hole and hurt myself.
Yeah.
And you're probably right.
When I step in a hole, my ankle, I can feel, you know, the difference in my foot.
There's a prosthetic, there's no way you would know you were stepping in a hole.
Yeah.
Or is that to really be careful with one or the other thing?
But the chances are too high, they're still doing it.
And we've talked about doing Frisbee golf.
And even that, you have to get out into the grass.
Yeah.
And the chances of hurting, I think your chance of a little bit higher probably with...
Yeah.
Frisbee golf.
Because you have to take so many steps when you're getting ready to throw the ball.
Throw the Frisbee, I mean.
Or as golf, golf, you're standing still when you're ready.
You know what I mean?
So your motion is fine.
But when you're throwing the Frisbee, you take a few steps to do it.
So that's when you can...
And you can't look down.
And what you're doing.
Because you're throwing to a place.
You know what I mean?
So I thought about that.
Too bad they don't have Frisbee mini golf.
Yeah, that'd be kind of cool if they did.
Well, something we can ask about Mokintum.
Go to the mini golf course and say, "Do you have any Frisbee's?"
Yeah.
Say if they got little Frisbee courses or something like that.
So look at us like we're...
Okay.
None.
And well, you never know unless you ask.
So, poppers.
I didn't do them when I was young.
But I don't miss them now that I'm old.
I, you know, I think I tried them once or twice.
And, you know, they didn't do anything for me at all.
It didn't feel right.
It just didn't.
And that's something you must avoid if you're taking Viagra.
Oh, really?
I mean, the two together can kill you.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Didn't know that.
Hmm.
Wonder why that is, though.
I'm sure people ignore that.
Oh.
And if the people who are protected by angels somehow they managed to mix the two.
Yeah, that's crazy.
I didn't know that.
I didn't know that they could kill you.
That's interesting.
But now I didn't like the way it made me feel.
And it just, sex is already fun.
And I think it was something you needed to add to it.
Yeah, I mean, so I thought it took away from it.
I have met a few guys who said that they could not get off without them.
Really?
I think that's more in the brain than it is.
Yeah.
I think it might be a tool, but I think you can still get off.
You know, you're not walking in their shoes.
But, um, yeah.
Okay, staying out all night and working the next day.
We kind of talked about that.
Yeah, kind of talked about that.
So that's something that young people do.
Yeah.
Jock straps.
I don't know why you would give that up when you get older.
But given, you know, the ass sags a little more than it did, there's still no reason why you,
especially if that's a fetish for you.
That turns you on with them.
Yeah, exactly.
So I don't know where that came from.
Yeah, the thing that kind of had a far, far corner.
Party drugs.
No, not really.
I don't think I could even name any.
Did they exist when I was coming out?
Yeah.
The 80s cocaine was freaking everywhere.
Oh, okay.
I mean, I never sought that stuff out.
No, I know.
I didn't hang around people who did.
No, I'm currently if you went to our party, there was there.
Yeah, there were drugs everywhere.
And I got it know most of the time that there were drugs around, but then if you kind of keep an eye open
and then see how people just reacting and certain new things and people disappearing and then reappearing and disappearing and reappearing.
That's party drugs.
They're going into other rooms with people who are doing the same things and so.
I remember I went on a cruise to somewhere in the Caribbean and I went on excursion, you know,
off the boat and shopping and stuff.
And being a single man, I wasn't with a group of people.
I was by myself.
It was probably a stupid thing I did in my 30s.
But people would come up to me and ask me if I wanted cocaine.
And I'd say no, and they go, hair went.
Some alcohol.
They just go down the list thinking that I would be interested and I wasn't in any of those things.
It's like the few times I've been to Mexico.
You go down the beach and a guy would come up with a book of briefcase.
And he'd have like silver chains.
Like he went these and like now then he would lift that board up and it'd be like illegal drugs.
And then lift that board up and be more different to him.
It's like not interesting.
I don't want any of this.
So, yeah, that's one of the big things down in Mexico, it's a tourist spot.
So, but yeah, not interesting.
But yeah, yeah, party drugs are everywhere.
You got to think too, where I grew up in South Jersey.
It was a resort town.
It was a party town during the summer.
So you weren't taking the drugs.
You were supplying the drugs.
I was selling it all.
How do you think I got skin in the college?
I paid my free to college.
But, yeah.
And I was pretty naive to it all.
Because my dad was a cop.
So, I'd just anything with drugs that kind of steer clear from.
And just keep my...
I don't know, eyes and ears closed to it.
And then after working on a bar for a while, you kind of pick up on it.
And then, you know, finding match boxes with little bag.
And inside them, and not someone lost their drugs, you know.
So, yeah.
Is there everywhere?
Okay, okay.
Looks like we're almost at the end.
We're thinking about what the other people think.
I bet you were guilty of this.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Yeah.
I don't think I was so much.
Now, yeah, I'd be surprised if you weren't.
Especially when I was really young, you know, in high school and college.
I didn't like any of those people.
So, I didn't care what they thought of me.
Yeah.
Yeah, no.
I was still...
Even now, I still get worried about it.
But it's not.
It's not new-y as much.
At some point in your life, you decide there's hardly anything that you can do anything about.
And worrying about what other people think is way down at the bottom.
Because people are going to think whatever they want to think anyway.
You can't stop that.
Yeah, and you're correct.
But it's a low self-esteem issue, you know.
Like I told you, I've ugly, dull, clinging syndrome.
So.
But I think I've gotten better about it.
I think so too.
No, thank you.
I think you have a lot to do with that.
So, about love.
Last one on the list.
There are people who think when I get old, I'm not going to be able to find love anymore.
And those are people who their entire view of themselves is their appearance.
And that's kind of sad.
You can find love at any age.
Some others proof of that, she just got married.
Yes.
Get for the third time.
Second time.
Officially that we know of.
Well, her first and second marriages were to my father.
Well, and then, I mean, look at us.
I mean, every man in our 20s, I don't think we wouldn't like each other.
No.
No, I would.
Who says I like you now?
That's true.
I think we just put up with each other.
This whole podcast is a farce.
But yeah, I don't think we would have got along.
At those ages, you're not as flexible about your outlook.
And it's probably a good thing that we didn't meet until much, much later.
Yeah, because I was.
You'll see.
We've been married for nine years.
But we met in 2012.
So we met for November of no 2011.
We met November of 2011.
So we've been together.
But it's 13.
13 years.
Yeah.
So I would have been 37.
So, yeah, I was.
I don't know, but it worked out perfectly.
So I'm so happy.
You look at me like I hit you.
No, I just think.
I'm just trying to think of how I would have been.
For instance, after your lake was amputated, you had an apartment.
I think your mother was paying for it.
And I asked you to move in with me and you said no.
I waited a whole another year for that contract to expire.
And I don't know in my 20s and 30s, I would have had the patience for that.
I mean, you would think you would have kicked me to the curb?
I could have moved on, I guess.
No, I'm happy you decided to stick with me.
I think it was hard for you to understand that I needed still that space.
Because I just got to have a relationship for so long.
I didn't let go of my own for forever.
But I think it all worked out the long run.
I waited the whole year for that.
For me to move in.
Well, are you happy it worked out?
Yep.
So am I.
All right, well, you got a joke for us this week?
Why did the old man fall into the cistern?
I have no idea.
Why?
Because he couldn't see that well.
Okay.
That was a good one.
That was good.
That was cute.
All right.
You can make me laugh.
I love you so much.
We hope you enjoyed episode 110 of the Baehr & Curadh Podcast.
This is Baehr.
This is Curadh.
Goodbye.
You have been listening to the Baehr and Curadh Podcast,
a production of the Land of Awes Information Services.
We can be contacted via email
using addresspodcast@ Awes.com
and Awes is spelled A-W-E-S.
.
This show is part of the Pride 48 Network.
Find all the best shows under the rainbow at Pride48.com.
[MUSIC]